![]() Sometimes it’s easy to believe that whatever hurts most is the thing that is going to be most effective. Sometimes pain or shame feels like change, the real, sticky, awful, believable engine of it. ![]() The Duolingo owl is a thesis about the ability of people to change, and what it might take for them to do so. He only cares whether you can offer your attention to him. He does not care if you are tired, or sad, or busy, or overjoyed, if you are out of work or have met someone new or lost someone you loved. The Duolingo owl cannot hear your excuses he does not make allowances for personal crises, or human flaws. He is easily hurt, and nothing is ever good enough for him. He does not indicate any relationship to flight at all. He is small and chipper and possibly flightless I do not think you ever see him spread his wings and soar across the screen in the app. Fucking Duo.The Duolingo Owl is green, which is a color no owl in real life has ever been. Not for any reason to do with Animal Crossing. I’ve just come to realise that I don’t like owls anymore. One of the characters is an owl named Blathers. Only then will I know peace.Īs an aside, I’ve also invested a considerable amount of hours into Animal Crossing: New Horizons. How long will this continue? I don’t know, but I have every intention of outliving Duolingo owl. It’s lovely being able to string together sentences to my parents and seeing their pleasantly surprised reactions, BUT I STILL HATE THE OWL. So I keep on completing lessons… and, well, I’m actually learning a lot. It’s not even about learning Indo anymore, I just don’t want to give Duo the satisfaction of beating me. But what I hate more is that the whole pushy guilt-tripping thing WORKS. Let’s see how much Indonesian that can teach you.” I hate the fucking owl. I shit you not I once received, “Go on, keep scrolling social media. The snarky owl even sends you passive-aggressive messages between lessons. When am I ever going to say that? Why am I filling my brain with it? It’s like Duo is actually fucking with you. ![]() For example: “kucing itu terbang” translates to “that cat is flying”. The Duolingo owl is specifically designed to guilt you into spending at least 10 to 15 minutes a day learning a language via some useful and completely useless phrases. This is what happens when you lose your streak. It never ends! I know I should just delete the app and regain power of my life, but I’m deathly afraid of what Duo will do to me. And more emails about “Sad Duo” if you miss days of practise. In case the notifications weren’t enough, he also sends emails. I don’t know if this is a universal thing but Duo will shoot me a notification every hour, every day from 7.30pm onwards. It was all very innocent at first, like “Hey, have you got a spare coupla minutes to learn some phrases?” and “Steff, it’s Duolingo time!” But as more days passed, Duo grew restless. Then things got harder, my motivation plummeted, and I grew tired of the green owl. So I completed the first couple of lessons with ease and pushed my way to the top of the leaderboard. My speaking skills on the other hand suck shit. Like I can’t catch every word of a government presser, but if Mum’s ragging on someone over the phone, I can so get in on the goss. ![]() Mum and Dad still speak Indo to me so my listening and comprehension skills are near perfection. Not to toot my own horn or anything, but when I first got the app I was on absolute fire. And if you don’t keep your place in the Top 45 on the weekly leaderboard, you’re cooked. Duo demands that you learn at least three lessons a day, otherwise he’ll throw a tanty. Duo is a little shit, hellbent on ruining your life. But no, dear reader, he is none of these things. At first, one might describe Duo as adorable, harmless, sweet. For those unacquainted with the aforementioned owl, his name is Duo and he’s the official mascot of the language learning app.
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